Today I did something I hardly ever do... I wore underwear. Why, you ask? Well...

I was having a theater-filled day with my main squeeze Patrick to celebrate the closing of the play (that he was starring in, that's right!) and one of the stops on our tour of Los Angeles theatrical offerings - right after seeing Del Arte's production "The Golden State" at the 24th Street Theater was the smash-hit sensation "Point Break Live" going down on weekends at Charlie O's Bar at the Alexandria Hotel in Downtown Los Angeles on Spring Street. Aww yeah...

Now, if you don't know already... Point Break Live is a live theatrical version of the awesome classic movie "Point Break" in which the Keanu Reeves character is picked from the audience. I had been invited to the show by friends involved with the production (Bill and his wife Anne - who's sister is the producer of the show) so I was real excited to go. My friend Shaughn Buchholz had recently gone and gotten picked to play the lead role of Johnny Utah, so I had a general idea of what we were in for.

So, the underwear. The underwear was for the rare chance that I got up the nerve to "audition" for the role of Johnny Utah AND was the audience favorite AND got picked by the director to play the part. If all of that HAPPENED to happen, then I would need to be able to do costume changes backstage... thus, the underwear.

As for why I never wear underwear... that is for another blog post.

As luck would have it... I *DID* muster to courage to audition for the role, and much to my surprise, I got it. That's right folks. For a few hours tonight, my name was Johnny Utah. I had to wear a wet suit, was soaked, smacked, fondled, tackled, squirted, and otherwise abused much to the delight of the crowd. I did exactly as I was told and delivered a most monotone and deadpan performance, only speaking what was on the cue cards, and only moving when told to move. I got to hang from the ceiling in a harness, chase a man through the streets with a gun, yell a lot, and learned to surf in the mix. It was exhausting and awesome.

I highly recommend the show. Tobias Jelinek, who plays Bodhi (the Patrick Swayze character) and Jennifer Jean who plays Tyler/the Lori Petty character (and studied improv at Second City AND we've had the same teacher - Scot Robinson of The Lampshades) were friggin' inspired. And Christi Waldon who was my personal PA and helped me survive the whole show was absolutely adorable. I will be eternally grateful and in awe of her energy.

Great cast, great concept, a great friggin' time at the theater. Thumbs up, yo! What's more... I got the whole thing on tape! Woo-hoo!

All in all, today was a very good day. I'm exhausted, I'm inspired, I've got fake blood in my hair. It's a wonderful life indeed.

If you are a friend of the Evangenitals on Myspace and you don't actually know me or the Evangenitals in what we skin-bound humans call "real life", you may be wondering why in the hell I periodically send you invites to Evangenitals' shows & events... especially since you never respond, live in a foreign or faraway land, and perhaps have no idea how we became friends in the first place.

(Please note: I always try to use the "search by location" feature of the invites first and foremost, which unfortunately never works... possibly because I have a Mac, possibly because the "search by location" feature on Myspace blows ass chunks, and possibly because no one I know enters their friggin' zip code or correct city.)

Once that option is exhausted, I have a very simple set of guidelines that I follow when deciding (without knowledge of where in the world anyone is) whom to send invites to. So, if you have received an invite from the Evangenitals, it is likely that you fall into one of these categories:

1. You look lonely. You look like you could use a friend, or perhaps just some sunlight. At a minimum, it appears to me that some time away from the computer would do you good.

2. You look awesome. There is something inherently RAD about your profile picture. You look like a giver; like someone who would contribute to a good time. Or, you may just have incredibly large jugs, which is a good feature to have at shows as well. Come on down.

3. You look like Patrick Swayze. If you are using Patrick Swayze as your profile picture, you are invited. Hell, if you're out there sporting anyone from the Outsiders, at any phase of their careers, YOU ARE GETTING INVITED!

4. You are a drunken mess. We are a band, people, and bands often play in bars. Bar bands need insane, sloppy, excessive drinkers to come to their shows and get good and stinking drunk and spend their rent money on booze to keep bar owners happy and booking good 'ol fashioned bar bands. So, if you have a profile picture that features you drunk out of your mind, passed out with and bunch of bottles, doing a beer bong, smoking a bong, vomiting, or holding a giant pint and/or a YARD of ale, you can bet your poisoned liver that YOU ARE INVITED!

5. Your name is Dave or David. I can't quite explain this one, but as a general rule I invite every goddamn "Dave" and "David" to every goddamn thing we do. It works for me.

6. YOU send ME a crapload of invites. You probably send me millions of bulletins as well, and you're always trying to post GIANT comments with your ENTIRE FUCKING TOUR plotted out on MY page, so I figure, a little e-vite from me shouldn't ruffle your feathers too much.

In the end, let it be known that I painstakingly pick and choose every single profile that I select and add, ONE BY ONE, to our evite list and send out our little plea for SOME sort of RESPONSE to the fact that WE EXIST.

If you don't know, now you know.

xo
julio